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03/17/2011

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Ah, sorry to hear the news. It was a long shot, but I was so hoping that this would be the one. I'm sending strengthening thoughts for the next cycle.

Sucks. Sucks. Sucks. Onward.

i don't even know how to word this without it sounding crazy to your friends in real life but speaking as an imaginary friend: i was so relieved to see from your diary entries that you've only been trying a year. i was late boarding this blog and i assumed you were well into the process, like a couple of years. sounds stupid on this day of disappointment to use the word relief...i know it does but you got lotsa light left at the end of that tunnel. you're just getting warmed up. i hate that you're away from your house/doggies/coffeepot & bed comforts when you get that kind of news-that even sucks suck but we here in the little village you've created will do what we can. in person i would be acting bartender and keep your glass more than half full. years ago, i sat in my dressing area, alone, holding a clearblue easy stick and watched, in disbelief as the lines get darker and darker. i confess to re-reading the instructions again and the lines got darker. i didn't call anyone and i didn't move. i sat there in the quiet, staring at that stick and knew every disappointment along the way was damn well worth it. and it was just us. our secret. that's what my journal entry said about that day...a day i can recall just as clear now as it was then. a sterling moment. i was half past 41. your moment will come-i see lotsa light ahead.

Sorry to hear that you are "not pregnant. again." I'm not a very religious person, but I do believe that God has a plan for us. It just sucks when his plan does not coincide with our own! On to IVF with stronger sperm :)

I like the idea of a one sentence journal. It seems like something I might be able to keep up with! Sorry about your BFN, again. I'm expecting the phone call this afternoon confirming the same fate for me, again.

I'm sorry. :( Gah.

jerie b's post gives me a lot of hope for your future baby. you are a star!

Ugh. Those dratted slow swimmers. Sorry to hear that. But I agree that IVF with strong sperm will be such a likelihood-booster. And thanks for the one sentence journal inspiration.

So sorry.

:-( never mind. next time.

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    • L.A. 2009. I’m stuck in traffic on the 101 freeway, listening to Isabella Rosselini on NPR. Isabella, for some reason, mentions that starfish are one of those rare species that can reproduce asexually, and I realize that if I could do that, I wouldn't have to worry about finding a boyfriend/husband. I wouldn’t have to internet date! I wouldn't have to figure out if I want to/can/should have a baby/adopt a baby/child on my own. I wouldn't have to stress about things like FSH levels, or weigh my feelings on in vitro versus adoption. I would just have a baby. Thus began my starfish envy.
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