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If the medical part of it lines up right, GO FOR IT!!!! Your professional life will fit around the pregnancy/baby, and if you wind up having to miss out on something professionally, there will be other opportunities down the road.

you're not old. don't stress...take a couple of months. you're not old. clock ticking but still running...and no 'what if' stuff...you keep looking for signs...trust me, they will find you.

I have one piece of advice here. The perfect time to have a baby is whenever that baby comes.

If you have a good shot you need to go for it. Don't borrow trouble that it's 9 months out! ;-)

I agree. If your body is ready for another try... go with your body. You'll have months to plan for how to juggle the rest of life around baby.

I say this as a loving reader... but I don't know where that third paragraph is coming from. You probably resist from talking too much about your professional life on here to keep a work/life balance... but seriously?! All you talk about is wanting a baby (and rightly so, since that is what you want). If the timing is right, don't push that off!

There is never a perfect time to have a baby. A baby upends your life no matter the time. And, there will never be a perfect time.

Try not to get so far ahead of yourself. Make decisions as each possibility presents itself.

it's never the right time! GO FOR IT!

Life is never simple and it will never be the right time...just say a vehement YES to this opportunity and maybe all of that good energy in the universe will be shared with your follicles too! All of that wheatgrass, aromatherapy and yoga might just be working its magic afterall...
Meanwhile I'm writing this while waiting in my RE 's office, oh joy!

Who knows where you will be or what will be happening 10 months from now? My personal philosophy when it comes to making decisions like this is to think about the fact that tomorrow I could step off the curb and be hit by a bus - and if so, it makes no sense to make a decision based on something that might or might not happen AFTER I get hit by the bus!

In a nutshell, I agree with everyone else - go for it if you have the follicles!

go for it! another woman writer friend has three children; the second and third were each born just as she had television pilots picked up, and one went to series. not ideal, lots of tough choices, but you work it out! xox


What everyone else said... You're never going to wake up one morning, look around and say, "Yep. Today is the day. Everything is in place and now I'm 100% ready to have a child... aaaaand GO!"

Everything works out the way it's supposed to work out. There's a silly little quote that my friend told me when my world was turned upside down a few years ago: "Write your plans in pencil but give God the eraser."

Could you do the retrieval but freeze all the embryos for a transfer later? I did mini-IVF and that was the protocol.

Screw waiting. There is never -- and I mean NEVER -- the right time to get pregnant. Never are you sitting around thinking, "Gosh, what am I going to do with all this extra time and money? Oh, I know! I can spend it all on a baby!" No way. You just do it and you manage and your life falls into place around you.

I could give plenty of examples from my own life and the lives of those I know, but this is YOUR life. Live it the way you want... and what you want is a baby.

no matter if you pull the trigger or not..you must NOT 'what if' yourself..only you can feel what's right for you- in your heart of hearts, when you close your eyes at night i think you will know and be good with your decision. you are a spiritual person...listen

I agree with most of your readers here ... There's never a "right" time to have a baby. My first was born 3 weeks before the premiere of the biggest movie I ever produced ... and I missed the European junkets (the woman who ultimately replaced me sat in my seat at the big star-studded dinner in Paris) ... and Asia ... and then I had to go to the U.S. premiere with a ton of baby weight and bad roots ... it was a bummer ... but not nearly as much a bummer as it would have been if she wasn't part of my life ... So if your body, mind and spirit align to allow a new soul in ... it's time ... right or wrong. Your career and your life will shift the way they need to ... that's just the way. xoxo

So, do you see a pattern here in all the replies. ;-) If the going is good, go for it!

Hi - I don't know if I've commented before, but I've been reading for a while - and I agree with those that say go for it (IVF) if you can! There is never, ever a perfect time for a baby - and although you may have time ... you may not, and if you regret anything it will be not trying when the timing looked go. Go make a baby!! :-)

I mean looked good...

Things will never be simple and there will never be a perfect time. Don't put IVF on hold for your career, your ovaries won't stop aging. This is coming from an old IVF vetran (I never thought I'd say those words). My eggs are past the point now, if I could go back a couple years I would do it in a heartbeat.

Hi Sarah, just came across your blog again and was struck by your should I should'nt I post and so related. My technique these days is Hell Yes or No, a little simplistic for your rather large life decision but thought I'd send anyway incase it helps and Derek sivers is such an inspiration. http://www.survivingorthrivingnow.com/2011/07/20/hell-yeh-or-no/

wishing you all the best

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    • L.A. 2009. I’m stuck in traffic on the 101 freeway, listening to Isabella Rosselini on NPR. Isabella, for some reason, mentions that starfish are one of those rare species that can reproduce asexually, and I realize that if I could do that, I wouldn't have to worry about finding a boyfriend/husband. I wouldn’t have to internet date! I wouldn't have to figure out if I want to/can/should have a baby/adopt a baby/child on my own. I wouldn't have to stress about things like FSH levels, or weigh my feelings on in vitro versus adoption. I would just have a baby. Thus began my starfish envy.
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